7 Tips to De-Stress: Completing the ‘Stress Cycle’
Stressed? If you are feeling stressed you are not alone. Many people are feeling more pressured, overwhelmed, irritated, or frustrated than they were a few years ago. According to the American Psychological Association study in 2021, 79% of employees felt stressed in the last month and of the employees who are stressed, 71% intend to look for another job in the next year. Based upon everything that has happened in 2021 and the beginning of 2022, stress levels have not improved.
So we know everyone is feeling more stressed, but what can we do about it? How can we feel less stressed?
In the book Burnout: The secret to solving the stress cycle, Dr. Emily Nagoski and Dr. Amelia Nagoski reason that our lives are filled with stress, but we are failing to complete the stress cycle. Understanding this and implementing simple fixes can free us from that unreleased pressure.
What is the stress cycle? It begins when we interact with a stressor and experience a spike in cortisol and adrenaline. A stressor can be an upset kid, your boss, an employee, a driver on the road, an email, etc. There are a lot of examples to choose from.
Now step back and imagine what the cycle might have looked like a long, long, long time ago. Instead of an email, the stressor would be something like a hungry lion, and a person would immediately decide to fight or run away. Subsequently they’d either walk triumphantly back to their tribe to celebrate killing the lion, or simply be happy to have made it back alive. But with either outcome, in that ending moment the cycle is completed. The hormones have been used up in the body and the stress has been released.
So what is different now? Unfortunately in this day and age we rarely complete the stress cycle. We get a mean email from a coworker or a call from an employee with a problem (the stressor) but then we sit there and stew, and then deal with it by making a phone call or sending another email. The stress hormones fill up in our body, and then we simply move on to the next thing. The stressful moments continue to stack up throughout the day. Then we go home (or we’ve been home all day) and we encounter more stressors. For me, it could just be someone asking me "what’s for dinner?" to trigger more stress. Many of us might then have a drink, watch Netflix, scroll Instagram, but none of those things help release the stacked up stress of the day. You can see how this happens each day and the stress builds and builds and eventually leads to burnout.
What can you do to complete the cycle?
Move: Move your body even if it’s for 3 minutes. This doesn’t have to be formal exercising. It can be a spontaneous dance party for one song, jumping up and down, taking the stairs, or waving your hands in the air. Doing these things throughout the day really can help you feel better. I have an alarm set in my phone that reminds me to stand up and I play one song and dance like no one is watching. (I’m still trying to get my husband to join in.)
Breathe: Take deep breaths and do ‘belly breathing’. There’s lots of available apps - calm, headspace, Breethe. I’ve used the Abide meditation app for years. My kids even ask for it when they have trouble falling asleep.
Talk to people: Call a friend, schedule a zoom with a coworker. The goal of being social is to remind your brain that you are safe and not all people suck.
Laugh: Laughing with other people even helps fulfill the social bonds and releases the opposite hormones as stress.
Connect with loved ones: Sometimes calling a coworker isn’t enough. Call someone you trust, respect and love. This can even be giving your kid or significant other a hug or kiss.
Cry: Whoever said "crying doesn’t solve anything" didn’t understand stress. This is why you can be so mad you burst into tears. It’s OK, you are just completing the cycle and will feel better once you cry.
Do something creative: Doing something you enjoy like sports, art, or cooking. These activities can bring up strong emotions in a good way.
Incorporating small things like these helped me with my stress level. Eventually, they can become habits, but I have alarms in my phone that remind me to check how I’m feeling and to move. My friend has an alarm set that automatically plays music so she can get up and dance. All of these things can help complete the stress cycle and release the built-up stress to prevent it from progressing to burnout.
Remember it’s not just you who’s feeling stressed, share these ideas with your employees too. When businesses are looking to hire more people, preventing 71% of stressed employees from leaving is incredibly valuable for your company.
